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Habits Are Interesting Things
They control 40 or more percent of what we do. Studies into habits have exploded over the past few decades, even more so in just the past 10 years. I am particularly fascinated by all of the studies and experiments pointing to how very much we are our habits, good or bad.
Having tried to change my fair share of habits over the years, it is been mind-blowing as well as exciting to learn how much we can really do to finally stop the things that harm us and begin doing those that benefit us. Is it easy? Not really, but just to KNOW HOW is amazing. I have read dozens of books and studies in the past few years, and let me tell you it still takes WORK, but at least now there’s hope.
Hope No Matter Your Age!
And I mean hope even if you’re over 50, or, yes, over 60 like I am. I have always been by nature (probably genetics) a negative person. Did you know that all humans are, to a greater or lesser extent? Think about it. When our brains were evolving (and of course they still are), what were the main things we had to worry about? Where to obtain food and shelter, and how to stay away from danger. And of course, how to pass on our genes, so sex was involved, too.
We evolved to see the dangers all around us, and to assume the worst. Is it any wonder that so many of us still do that? And isn’t it extremely refreshing to know that it’s not some sort of flaw? And that telling yourself (or having someone else tell you) to “just get over it,” or “stop thinking that way,” or some other such nonsense was never going to work?
I cannot tell you what a relief it was when I started learning this stuff. Not that I didn’t still worry (mostly needlessly), but at least I knew I wasn’t doing something wrong. In fact, I was completely normal.
Of course, here in the US, at least where I live and under my circumstances, I don’t generally have to worry about my food and shelter, or some scary animals coming after me at every turn. So, I worry about everything else, mostly stuff that will likely never happen. What a drain on my energy and my sanity.
I worry what people think of me; if I am really a good friend, wife, mother; if I’m a fraud at my job; will people really give a crap about what I think or say or write? So yeah, basically I worry about everything. All the time. It’s exhausting. Not to mention destructive.
So, it’s not like I just thought, “oh goodie, it’s not my fault,” and just went on my merry way. No, I have learned ways to “train my elephant” to do what I want her to do. What the heck does that mean? Stay tuned, and you’ll find out. It’s gonna be a wild ride, and your life is gonna change for the better because of it.
Remember, you’ll have to do some work, but at least you’ll finally have practical tools. And it’s not years of expensive therapy, thank goodness.